Pumpkin Cupcakes with Cream Cheese Frosting

Basic white bitch here, and I don't care who knows it. It's fall, and I want pumpkin. There, I said it. I don't know why there's so much pumpkin hate all of a sudden, but I say, find any pleasure you can in this cataclysmic world that is 2020 right now. I prefer to have my happiness slathered with some cream cheese frosting, thank you very much. 

This recipe makes a three layer 9-inch round cake or 24 cupcakes (plus a little extra). 

For the batter:

1/2 c vegetable oil

1 c pumpkin puree (not canned pumpkin pie filling)

1 1/2 c granulated sugar

1/2 c brown sugar

3 eggs 

1 tsp vanilla extract 

3 1/2 c all-purpose flour

1 1/2 tsp baking powder

1 1/2 tsp baking soda

1 tsp salt 

3/4 tsp cinnamon

1/4 tsp ground cloves

1/4 tsp ground ginger

1 c buttermilk 

1. Preheat oven to 350F and prepare cupcake pans with liners and grease a small pan (I usually do 6 in) for the extra batter. 

2. In stand mixer fitted with paddle attachment, mix together oil, pumpkin puree, granulated sugar, and brown sugar. 

3. Add in vanilla extract and the eggs, mixing to incorporate after each egg. 

4. In a separate bowl, combine flour, baking powder, baking soda, salt, and spices. 

5. Pour 1/3 of the dry ingredients into the sugar mixture and mix to combine. 

6. Pour 1/2 of the buttermilk into sugar mixture and combine. 

7. Pour another 1/3 of dry ingredients. 

8. Pour second 1/2 of buttermilk. 

9. Pour in last 1/3 of dry ingredients. 

10. Distribute into pans and bake for 18 - 22 minutes or until a toothpick inserted comes out clean. 

11. Allow to cool completely before topping with frosting. 

For the frosting:

1 1/2 sticks unsalted butter, room temp

12 oz (1 1/2 boxes) cream cheese, room temp

5 ish c powdered sugar

Splash of vanilla

Pinch of salt  

Splash of milk or cream (optional)

1. Put butter and cream cheese into stand mixer fitted with paddle (or whisk) attachment and start to add in powdered sugar slowly to incorporate. Start with about 4 c, and see how you like the texture. You can always add more. 

2. Add in vanilla and salt. Whip for a few minutes until fluffy. You can add a splash of milk if it's too thick. *This is a pretty thick frosting though, because cream cheese. 

3. Put in a pastry bag with your desired tip and frost the cupcakes. *I actually just snipped a big whole in my pastry bag and went to town; didn't use a tip. I feel like there's a that's what she said joke in there somewhere. 

4. Please ask me how much frosting I made the first time and why I ended up with an entire pastry bag still full at the end of all my frosting... 

Apple Pie Crumb Bars

I am very much a summer girl, but I tell ya, this Fall got me leaning hard into it. I feel like COVID is sucking all the joy out of everything, so if I want to celebrate Fall, I will, damnit. Sorry, the anger is not directed at you. Anyway, we continue our sepia-toned journey this Fall with apple pie crumb bars. Shortbread crust covered with apple pie filling and topped with crumb topping (as all pies should be). This makes about a 13 x 9 pan- I actually made two 8x8 inch pans with this recipe, but it'll work well in a 13 x 9 as well.  OR You can do it all in one 8x8 inch pan and have fatties. I've done this also, and I'm not mad about it. *You will see just a few changes to the original recipe that need to be made for this option. 

For the apple pie filling:

I like to start here so that you don't feel rushed trying to cut up all these apples while the shortbread bakes. 

7 apples *I used golden delicious and pixie crunch because we went apple picking, and that's what we had, but you want to use any kind of tart, baking apple- the queen is always granny smith. ** IF you are doing the fatties (just one 8x8 in pan, you will use 4 apples)

1/2 c granulated sugar *Or 1/3 c for fatties

3/4 tsp cinnamon

1/4 tsp cardamom

1/8 tsp ground cloves

Pinch of ground ginger

Pinch of salt

Juice of 1/2 a lemon

1 tbsp corn starch * 1/2 tbsp corn starch for fatties

1. peel and cube apples into smallish pieces- you want it to homogenize some so that it stays in the bars after cooked, so smaller is better. 

2. Put apples, spices, and lemon juice into a medium pan on the stove and start to cook at medium-low heat. 

3. Once some of the juices start to come out of the apples, add the tbsp of corn starch. This will help thicken all those juices. 

4. Continue to cook until the filling becomes rather thick and the apples start to soften- a little bite in there is fine! You can start on the shortbread while this cooks. 

For the shortbread:

2 sticks unsalted butter, room temp

1/2 c granulated sugar 

2 c all-purpose flour *this is a little less than I usually use, but it worked well for me. If it feels too wet and not very sandy, you can add a bit more*

3/4 tsp salt

1/2 tsp cardamom 

Zest of 1 lemon

1. Preheat oven to 350 F and line pan with parchment (with a bit of overhang so you can pull it out of the pan for cutting and serving), and spray with cooking spray. 

2. Put butter and sugar in stand mixer fitted with paddle attachment and cream together for a few minutes. 

3. Add spices and lemon zest. Slowly add in flour until you get the desired texture (that 2ish cups we discussed). 

4. Pour out into prepared pan and press down into a solid layer. 

5. Par-bake at this point for about 20 minutes; start on the crumb topping while it's baking. 

For the crumb topping:

1/2 c all-purpose flour

1/2 c brown sugar

1/2 c butter, cold and cubed

1/2 c rolled oats 

1. Place all ingredients in a bowl and combine. *use a pastry cutter or your hands to get butter to about pea size. 

Assembly:

1. After shortbread is par-baked, take out of oven and top with the apple pie filling and the crumb topping. 

2. Bake again for about 40 - 50 minutes or until topping is golden brown and set. 

3. Allow to cool COMPLETELY before trying to take out of pan to cut. Or if you're not planning to share, stick a spoon in it and go to town, but don't say I didn't warn you that it's demon hot. Proceed with cautious abandon. 

Peanut Butter Cookies

These are an oldie, but a goodie. I have been trying to get my freaking cookie recipes down, and I think I finally got this one! These are chewy, peanut buttery, and the exact kind of nostalgia I want in a peanut butter cookie. I have found that you always need more fat and less flour for cookies than you think you will. I find that's mostly true in life in general as well. This recipe makes about 2.5 dozen (more or less depending on the size you make them). 

For the Cookies: 

1 stick unsalted butter, room temp

1 c peanut butter *I used creamy, but you could totally use crunchy as well. 

1/2 c brown sugar

1/2 c granulated sugar

2 eggs

1 1/2 c all purpose flour

1 tsp vanilla

3/4 tsp salt

1/2 tsp baking soda 

Extra sugar for rolling dough in

1. Preheat oven to 350F. 

2. In a stand mixer fitted with paddle attachment, combine butter and peanut butter. Add sugars and cream together. 

3. Add eggs and vanilla, stirring to incorporate. 

4. In a separate bowl, mix together dry ingredients; slowly incorporate into wet ingredients. 

5. Chill for about 20 minutes before scooping out. 

6. Scoop out cookies and roll into balls. Drop them into a little bowl of sugar to coat. 

7. Place them on a baking sheet and press down with a fork in a cross-hatch pattern to get the signature look.

8. Bake about 10 - 12 minutes. I find that these are kind of like brownies- you do NOT want to overbake them, but a little underbaked is fine. 

Oatmeal Cream Pies

So mom and I took a Friday off and decided to day drink and bake, like you do. She was like let's do oatmeal cookies, and I was like, I see your oatmeal cookies, and I raise you oatmeal cream pies. So we made oatmeal cream pies, and mom was like, the big scoop will be fine, so now we have oatmeal cream pies the size of our heads. So, if you want the giants, you will get about 1 dozen pies. If you want more normally sized pies, you could probably get about 18 or so. Follow your heart, though. You know what you need. 

For the cookies:

1 c (2 sticks) unsalted butter, room temp

1/2 c brown sugar

1/2 c granulated sugar

2 eggs

1 tsp vanilla extract

1 c all-purpose flour

2 c old fashioned oats

3/4 tsp salt

3/4 tsp baking powder

3/4 tsp cinnamon 

1. Preheat oven to 350F. In a stand mixer fitted with paddle attachment, cream butter and sugars together. 

2. Add eggs and vanilla extract. 

3. In a separate bowl combine dry ingredients (oats, flour, salt, baking powder, and cinnamon) and then slowly incorporate into the butter mixture. 

4. Scoop onto a baking sheet and bake (if you're doing the big mamas, it's about 15-18 mins; if you're doing normal sized cookies, it's about 10 - 12 mins). 

For the buttercream center:

1 c (2 sticks) unsalted butter, room temp

3 ish c powdered sugar

Splash of vanilla

Pinch of salt 

1. In a stand mixer fitted with paddle attachment, put in butter and slowly incorporate powdered sugar. 

2. Add the vanilla and salt and mix to incorporate. *you do want this to be pretty thick so you get the classic cream pie feel. 

3. On completely cooled cookies, pipe (or just schmear with a knife) the buttercream on half of the cookies and top with the other cookies. 

4. If you made the big ones, feel free to cut them in half and pretend like you're only going to eat half of it... and then go back and eat the other half when no one is looking.